Sarah’s life had turned into a nightmare. John made life unbearable for the young mother. The only bright spots in her life were her precious children. They were such a blessing to her and she loved staying home with them.

Sarah tried to shield them from the anger her husband poured out on her. Years later, she trembled to think of what those little ears heard through the walls of their rooms. Decades later, John admitted that he that he purposefully started fights with her. 

Along with the obsessive, controlling behavior, there was physical abuse. It wasn’t every day or even every week, but it was there.  If she tried to get away from him, he would grab her and squeeze so hard, she thought she would be crushed. He would smash furniture and occasionally throw things at her. He pushed her down, twice breaking fingers. He violently raped her once.  

One year, he attended a Promise Keepers rally.   Sarah was glad he went, hoping he would turn his life around and treat her with kindness and love. Instead, it gave his superiority complex a major boost.  He came home a raging bull, demanding that she be a submitful wife and even dragging her by her hair.  She vowed then that she would never do what he wanted.  She only smoked one or two a day, only to keep his anger at bay. The rest she hid, gave away, or sold.

She had so much bearing down on her and needed a release.  One night, after everyone else was sleeping, with pen and paper,  she found her release.